Toxic Masculinity and Depression

The Roots of Toxic Masculinity

Gender norms and expectations often condition men to suppress strong emotions. This can lead to men believing that suppressing or holding one’s feelings in is something that is expected of them. Men growing may be conditioned to control and restrict their emotions, demonstrate toughness, assert independence, and avoid appearing weak or feminine to others around them [1]. As such, masculinity is usually associated with stoicism, dominance, aggression, and competitiveness. Naturally, the combination of all these characteristics on the whole can be harmful as it is seen as adherence to gendered attitudes [2]. However, past a certain point, men may also be expected to refrain from sharing their feelings with others around them, even to their close friends and families. Such unhealthy norms and expectations may be linked to “toxic masculinity,” which has been argued to be a reaction to the feminist movement in the 80s and 90s. Toxic masculinity promotes unrealistic and unhealthy views of men and their role in society. These ideals promote a form of “warrior” masculinity, seen through male-only workshops, wilderness retreats, and even drumming circles [3].

Little is known about toxic masculinity within the Malaysian cultural context. The Women's Aid Organization (WAO), however, argues that some cases of violence against women can be traced to toxic masculinity. Free Malaysia Today reporter Sheith Khidhir bin Abu Bakar reports that as long as men are conditioned to believe that excessive, toxic forms of masculinity are tolerated by society, they will present themselves as a threat to the women around them. To illustrate his point, Khidir details an incident where a female security guard was assaulted after she attempted to stop a visitor from entering a condominium in Penang. WAO communications officer Tan Heang Lee stresses that men needed to ‘unlearn’ toxic masculinity because it encourages them to seek violent solutions to their problems. Tan addressed the ideas of toxic masculinity with stereotypical words such as “tough”, “aggressive”, “emotionless”, “dominant”, “angry”, and “violent”, while devaluing feminine traits such as kindness, gentleness, empathy [4].

Toxic Masculinity and its Effects

Toxic masculinity has been the subject for research and has shown to have a negative impact on the well-being of men [1]. Findings from research done by sociologist Raewyn Connell state that ideas about masculinity are shaped by class, race, culture, and sexuality. Connell theorizes that ideals of masculinity, like social respect, physical strength, and sexual potency become problems if the standards are set to be unachievable. That is, if men fail to reach these ideals, they can become anxious and insecure, causing them to be prompted to use forceful approaches to appear more dominant [5]. Indeed, studies show that boys and men who hold sexist attitudes are more likely to commit violence. An example is how the research funded by companies selling alcoholic drinks deny that alcohol and violence are associated with one another. Instead, such companies have chosen to blame masculinity and the cultures of drinking for men’s’ aggressive acts. Put another way, the alcohol industry amplifies unjustified feminist arguments that toxic masculinity, is a result of feminizing boys. This inadvertently discourages men to be forthcoming of their struggles and challenges. Toxic masculinity may thus, in part, stem from social and cultural factors that conflict with emotions boys and men are genuinely feeling [1], leading them to instead think, “I am stupid, weak, or too emotional, and everyone might judge me if I don’t hide my feelings.” [6].

Concepts and beliefs about masculinity are shaped by racial, religious, social class, experience, and cultural identities [7]. The imagery of how men should be like begins early in one’s life and can affect a child’s understanding of which emotions are appropriate self-image. Boys are shamed by their peers and even parents at a young age as a lesson to conform to the male gender role norms [8]. Children can be conditioned to believe certain things about the ‘right’ emotions to expressed through statements such as “don’t be a sissy” and “boys don’t cry”. The shame of not adhering to these emotion scripts can be stressful and ultimately affects men’s willingness to seek help [6]. These conditions provide the conditions for toxic masculinity to fester. Men are then led to believe that aggression and violence are both being acceptable means by which to resolve their problems [1].

In the United States, conversations about toxic masculinity have become intertwined with the broader concerns of gender equality. Women now hold leadership positions, are allowed to earn almost as much as men in terms of salary and can pursue ambitious careers more often. Yet, double standards continue to exist because of society’s failure to address gender equality as a cultural issue and not just a women’s issue. Fortunately, there have also been signs of movements and awareness initiatives in the country. Many higher education institutions have begun efforts to spread awareness and concerns about toxic masculinity. Examples include efforts by the Men Can Stop Rape organization and the Men’s Project at University of Wisconsin-Madison. But the battle cannot be fought by institutions and organizations alone. Members of society can help others – the men in their lives, in particular, develop healthier perspectives and definitions of masculinity. We can also start by promoting healthy masculinity and teach boys and young men to recognize, reject, and challenge toxic masculinity [7].

Depression as a Consequence of Toxic Masculinity

Societal and cultural expectations are a destructive combination which contributes to toxic masculinity. Together, they shape men into believing that assertion and aggression are accepted as methods to resolve the challenges they face. A combination of both these gender norms and men’s reluctance to seek mental health support might be the reason why men who subscribe to ideas of toxic masculinity, tend to experience depression more than women. Studies showed that depressed men tend to externalize their struggles through aggression, risk-taking behaviours, and substance abuse [9]. Critically, depression can be complicated by unhealthy masculine ideals of stoicism that discourage help-seeking [10]. It becomes challenging to identify which actions and behaviours indicate depression in men because many of these behaviours are similar to men’s masculine ideals [11].

Among undergraduate university men, conformity to masculine norms is related to higher chances of alcohol consumption, and this may in turn, be symptomatic of major depressive disorder. Among college-aged men, studies showed that the rise in masculine norms can restrict men’s help seeking tendencies. Since men’s’ idealized masculine behaviours are associated with characteristics such as anger, solitude, and risk-taking, these attributes can further restrict their help-seeking tendencies for mental health support. Rather, these characteristics discourage help-seeking because help-seeking is perceived as “feminine” behaviour. The refusal to seek help, unfortunately, leads to poorer emotional well-being, characterized by periods of anger, numbness, vulnerability, or sadness. Collectively, findings showed that men who follow these masculine ideals are more likely to experience depression but are unfortunately less likely to seek help. This can lead to increased depression and consequently, emotional stress [12] and suicide [13].

Cultivating Healthy Masculinity

It is important to note that the very topic of masculinity is itself a complex and multifaceted issue. What is addressed in this article merely scratches the surface of an important, yet under-studied concern in today’s society. Author Kathleen Elliot (2018) suggests that it will be good to provide boys of all ages with diverse role models of men and masculinity to encourage them to explore their own identities. Modeling is also important, as it shows one how to respect all genders and sexualities, demonstrates vulnerability and the courage to express one’s emotions. Students can also be encouraged to think more critically about masculinity and gender. For one, expressions such as “that’s so gay” or insults like “pussy” should be called out as being inappropriate or downright homophobic. As such, educators can also play a role in being straightforward and explicit when educating their students about the harmful effects of using such terms. Students will in turn, understand that using sexist terms are harmful and can further perpetuate unhealthy masculine norms. Once they understand that there are long-term consequences for their words, they will be more likely to recognize the role they can take to be more supportive and accommodating of boys and men in their lives [6].

Reference:

[1] Magovcevic, M., & Addis, M. (2008). The masculine depression scale: Development and psychometric evaluation. Psychology of Men & Masculinity, 9, 117–132.

[2] Pappas, S. (2019). APA issues first-ever guidelines for practice with men and boys. Monitor on Psychology, 50(1).

[3] Salter, M. (2019). The problem with a fight against toxic masculinity. The Atlantic, 27.

[4] Sheith Khidir Abu Bakar (2018). ‘Toxic Masculinity’ To Blame for Violence, Says WAO. Free Malaysia Today. Retrieved from: 'Toxic masculinity' to blame for violence, says WAO

[5] Connell, R. (2014). The study of masculinities. Qualitative Research Journal.

[6] Shepard, D. S., & Rabinowitz, F. E. (2013). The power of shame in men who are depressed: Implications for counselors. Journal of Counseling & Development, 91(4), 451-457.

[7] Elliott, K. (2018). Challenging toxic masculinity in schools and society. On the Horizon.

[8] Hlavka, H. R. (2017). Speaking of stigma and the silence of shame: Young men and sexual victimization. Men and Masculinities, 20(4), 482-505.

[9] Seney, M. L., Huo, Z., Cahill, K., French, L., Puralewski, R., Zhang, J., ... & Sibille, E. (2018). Opposite molecular signatures of depression in men and women. Biological Psychiatry, 84(1), 18-27.

[10] Oliffe, J. L., Galdas, P. M., Han, C. S., & Kelly, M. T. (2013). Faux masculinities among college men who experience depression. Health, 17(1), 75-92.

[11] Kimmel, M. S. (2008) Guyland: The perilous world where boys become men. New York: Harper Collins.

[12] Jasso-Medrano, J. L., & Lopez-Rosales, F. (2018). Measuring the relationship between social media use and addictive behavior and depression and suicide ideation among university students. Computers in Human Behavior, 87, 183-191.

[13] Mahalik, J. R. & Rochlen, A. B. (2006) Men’s likely responses to clinical depression: What are they and do masculinity norms predict them? Sex Roles 55: 659–667.

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